I felt the need to blog today as I have not in a while and for the fact that I have been told some really bad news today...
That bad news would be that the guy who I wanted to go to the formal with has just heard back from the girl who he asked and she said yes. FML!!!!!!!!!!! Not only that, it was the way he told me by wrapping his arms around me and whispering in my ear that she had said yes. WHAT TYPE OF WAY IS THAT OF TELLING SOMEONE???????? Please tell me I would love to know. This is probably a good time to mention that the guy is Doug
The thing is that everyone was sure that she would say no, even Doug thought she would say no. When he told me I was in shock and he could see it on my face by the way he looked at me. He could see that I wasn't happy for him. I just went really quiet and withdrawn from everything. I have a habit of doing this when something is bothering me or I'm upset about something. In this case I was both of these things. It's not a good feeling when the guy you wanted to go with has someone else. It makes it worse when that guy has made it his "mission" to find someone for you.
A lot of people are trying to get me to go with another guy in our grade but I don't really want to go with him. There's nothing wrong with him, I just want to go with a guy that I actually talk to a lot and someone that I'm actually friends with him and that's just not this guy. People are just pressuring me into sonething that I really don't want to do. I just want to make my own decision and not have anyone making them for me. I'm not a child I can think for myself but people just don't seem to think that.
What a way to end a school term with Doug not talking to me, almost crying in drama and crying on the bus because of what has happened during the day. I just want to have the freedom of making my own choices and not having anyone else have any imput into them. Only me. Plus I do want to go to the formal with a guy and have a great night with him but I just don't see how that is going to happen because at the moment I don't have any male friends. I also feel so stupid for putting faith in Doug. He has failed me so many times and now he has done it again.
He did tell me that he would be asking her and that he never thought that she would say yes. I put my faith in to someone that can't be trusted with someone else's feelings and I fell for it again.
Now I just have to find someone amazing to go with but I think I've run out of amazing people in my life. I guess I'll just have to see what will happen....
